Cookies. Which I invented. You're welcome.

((***Updatet: I wrote this post two days ago.  In the meantime, I have realized that it actually sounds a lot more sarcastic than I meant it to sound.  When I am writing these posts, I usually have limited time to write, and am just trying to finish before the children wake up from their naps.  I actually have done more research on gluten and believe that the rest of my family would benefit from not eating gluten.  It's not always the foods themselves, like various grains and wheat, that are harmful, but the ways in which they are processed before being packaged in this country.  Unfortunately, the gluten free options aren't always much better.  You can do the research on your own.  I also would actually really like to start using carob chips in place of chocolate chips; I just don't know where to find them and am still not willing to have to go to one more store for one item!  SO this food thing is really a work in progress, as I strive for excellence in my family's nutrition, without compromising on taste and satisfaction.  Eating well just makes you feel better, and I strive to create nutritious things that are also delicious and completely satisfying.  I'll post some more recipes soon!))


"I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you." 

Psalm 63:5

(David, to God)

Wow, food. 

I don't put much stock in whatever dietary advice is currently trending.  It would be a poor return on my investment, since dietary trends change so very often.  I have long held the belief that the foods God originally placed on this earth for humans to eat MUST be good for us.  In fact, I suspect that they must be the BEST foods for us to eat, even in ways that current science has not yet figured out.  Not everything is a scienctifically quantifiable fact; some things you just know because of how they make you feeeeeel.  The feeeeeeeeeling of having lasting energy and wakefulness is not a lie.  No one can actually tell you what foods work for your own body;  I don't understand the physiology of it all, but some people can tolerate certain foods and some people cannot.

     I have no allergies.

     I have the immune system of an ox.

     That previous statement assumes that oxen immune systems are as strong as an ox.  That's how strong my immune system is.  I almost never get sick.  

     But I have a child who was getting sick for no apparent reason this past year, and my aunt suggested to me that it might be an intolerance to gluten.  The irony is that I know that gluten is the popular band wagon thing everyone is currently avoiding like the plague.  But in my child's case, said child would ACTUALLY get sick.  Like SICK sick.  Involving actual throw up.  Not just, "I think she has a leaky gut."  

     The other ironic thing is that at the time of this apparent gluten intolerance appearing in my child, I didn't even realize that I myself had not been eating gluten.  Me, Miss "I don't do band wagon eating plans," without even thinking about it, I just wasn't.  I was filling up on things like sweet potatoes, greek yogurt, eggs with avocados.  The newly acquired Nutribullet was being used several times a day as the source from which I was finally able to injest cruciferous vegetables without gagging.  I was so full and satisfied that I never thought about bread or the barley, rye, and malt types of foods in which gluten hides.  And so I realized that removing the gluten from my child's life would not be very hard; I would just feed Child like I was already feeding myself.  

     Upon the removal of the gluten, wouldn't you know it, but Child's symptoms disappeared?  So then my lack of eating gluten became deliberate.  Still not because I was about to jump on the "gluten is the sum of all evil" band wagon, but because I was not going to tell Child to eat some special way that I was not also willing to eat.  The rest of my family still eats gluten, but this one particular Child and I are one in GF solidarity. 

      So then there I was, at the store, reading labels, and seeing Gluten Free alternatives all around me.   You can find them at every grocery store.  They are the boxes half the size of the gluten version for double the price.  And then you read the back of the package and it goes: 

  Gluten Free Flour Ingredients: White Rice Flour, Brown Rice Flour, Potato Starch, Coconut Flour, Pinto Bean Flour, Guargum, and a sprinkling of dead sea salt water.  And a kitchen sink too.

...versus the box of the Gluten full, double sized, half priced alternative which goes:

Whole Wheat Flour Ingredients: Whole Wheat Flour.

And you stand in the aisle and scratch your head and go, "Am I missing something here?  Are that many things of randomly selected variety supposed to all be stuffed and ground together and digested in my stomach like that?   Is that going to cause something to go off in outer space, or like, grow a tree in my gut or something?    I have a suspicion that simply eating plain old WHOLE WHEAT is better for me than all of...that stuff.  

But hey, it's gluten free, right? 

(wink) 

....and then I actually did some baking with the gluten free flour mixes.  And then I actually ate the things I had baked.  The flavor was great!  But then I would feel like a brick was expanding and nesting within my stomach, and I would feel light headed and loopy.  Maybe it's just me, but I highly suspect that that is not the feeling of a gut becoming un-leaky.  

My oldest child pointed out to me that  maybe just maybe I wouldn't feel so sick if my brain contained an off switch when it comes to sweets.  So like, maybe if I would eat just one, I wouldn't feel so bad.  But see this is why you cannot listen to the things your children say.  They have a tendency to see with lazorlike precision exactly what is wrong with you, and point it out to you, and point it out again and again, without ever sugar coating it, not ever even once.  

     Hi, my name is Michelle, and I lack the off switch part of my brain when it comes to sweets.  I have stories upon stories of this, but let's just say that in my mind, it is cruel to offer someone the actual portion size listed on the package.  And this is not a good quality in me, not good at all. 

 I also find that the opposite is true: I can completely avoid sweets and never miss them.  Except for the times that I do miss them, and for those times, I need a solution, one that does not involve breaking my word to Child that I would not partake of gluten, and also would not make me sick by it's sick ingredients.  

     So I had to come up with my own.  

     And in doing so, I began to share what I had discovered with the people around me, and in doing so, the people around me began to request my recipes, in exact measurements and quantities.  Because the people around me don't exactly understand just how scatterbrained I actually am.  But for the sake of the masses of fellow non gluten eaters, I will share some of the cookie things I have been inventing and baking.  

    In my mind, these are more delicious than anything I ever ate back in my gluten full days.  

Before I get to my recipes, here is the belief system behind them:

-I am not willing to shop at specialty grocery stores.

-I am not willing to spend a fortune on groceries, so I seek out affordable alternatives.

-I like simple ingredients, and knowing exactly what I am putting in my own food.

    - I like eating real food.  By real food, I mean not chemicals.  Not synthetic alternatives and man made weird stuff.  By real food, I also mean that if you are going to eat eggs, eat the yolk, too.  If you are going to eat the cheese, for instance, you eat real cheese, not the "low fat" alternatives; it's not natural for someone to remove the naturally occurring fat out of the cheese.  The same is true for butter and cream and milk.  I don't believe in 1% or low fat or NO Fat milk.  If you're going to drink milk, drink it whole.  Your brain needs to omega 3's!  And while we are discussing fat as a dietary reality, 

    - I am a big believer in eating fat.  All the kinds.  Butter, avocado, nuts, and their oily counterparts.  I don't often eat red meat, but I believe that on the rare occasion that I do eat red meat, it's wise to leave some of the fat on there!  I believe with all of my heart, mind, soul, and heart, that eating like this is good for your brain, your skin, and that it helps your body absorb all of the other nutrients you put in.  Plus, a little bit of fat goes a long way in filling you up and actually satisfying you.  

    Speaking of satisfied: 

I believe in eating until you are satisfied, 

whether that is the portion size on the box or not.  GORGING is not satisfied.  Gorging is stuffing your feeling and grief and numbing yourself like you would with any other drug.  But that is another topic for another blog post.  

     And there's this tiny little detail you might find interesting: 

By eating like this, I have never gained weight.

And I feel great.

**HUGE NOTE!  I am not a food scientist, I am not a chemist or a biologist or a chef or anything like that.  The things I wrote above just MAKE SENSE TO ME, and my body is happy, and my skin is clearer and softer than ever, and my mind is not foggy.  

So with that in mind, and with the tweaking of some other recipes I have found, I present you with the best best best cookies I have ever eaten:  

Chocolate Chip Nut Butter Cookies  

2 cups of ground almonds

1/2 cup of ground walnuts

1/4 cup of either ground cashews or ground pecans-or not.  

(-A word about the ground up nuts:  I buy nuts at Grocery Outlet because they are cheaper, and grind them into the texture of flour in my nutribullet.  But you can also buy them pre-ground at Trader Joes and other such stores.

-Any combination of ground nuts work for this recipe, but mostly almonds and then walnuts are my favorite combination

-I have had a lifelong hatred of walnuts; to me they are bitter!  But when I grind them and use them in place of flour, the bitter taste is gone.)

1/2 tsp of baking soda

1/2 teaspoon of pink himalayan sea salt

1 egg

1/2 to 3/4 cup of melted coconut oil

1/2 cup of your favorite nut butter (Peanut, cashew, almond, etc...but note: Just know when you eat peanuts that they are considered legumes, and not nuts.  If that matters to you at all.)

1/2 a bag of dark or semi sweet chocolate chips.

If you want to add sweetness, you can also add a half cup of honey.  

-Feel free to add vanilla or cinnamon; these work with or without it.

-Feel free to add secret superfoods like chia seeds and crushed flax; I have done this and you can't even tell or taste the difference.  

Mix all ingredients until they are all blended.  

Bake at 350 degrees for approx 10 minutes, depending on your oven and depending on how firm or soft you life your cookies.

Alternatives to this recipe, which are AMAZING:

PUMPKIN CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES:

Do everything exactly as listed above, only Instead of nut butter, add a 15 ounce can of organic pure pumpkin.  This actually makes your cookie dough go father, which means you make more cookies this way!  The texture with the pumpkin will be softer than the texture with the nut butter, and you might want to leave them in for five minutes or so to firm them up.  Or just eat them soft.  Either way!

An even MORE delicious alternative: 

 BANANA CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES:

Instead of a can of pumpkin, add a smashed banana!  The taste is exactly that of chocolate chip banana bread.  Probably your ideal baking time would be 11-12 minutes for these.

Even more CRAZY but still sweet and delicious of an alternative:

PUMPKIN BANANA CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES:

Add BOTH a 15 oz can of pumpkin and a smashed banana!  It's just sweet, but not distinctly banana or pumpkin tasting.  With THIS alternative, you can say that you are eating both a vegetable and a fruit, all in one cookie.  The chocolate chips just add meaning.

But by all means, if you are one of those "no chocolate chips ever" people, feel free to (I am wincing as I type this) substitute with raisins or craisins.  My friend uses carob chips.  I like that idea, but I'm just not sure where to find carob chips around here.  (not that I have actually spent any time looking.  But refer to my basic rule of thumb against having to shop anywhere specialty.)

And bam, there you go.  

Who wants cookies for breakfast, lunch, and dinner?

Me, me, and me.

But I will refrain and instead keep it to a late afternoon snack which substitutes as dinner, and call that good enough.

Love and Happy, Healthy Baking!