On the backside of a birthday

     Right now, a certain Four Year Old Child has no toys.  

You're thinking, "but it's 2014 in the United States, HOW CAN THAT POSSIBLY BE?" 

Well, I'll tell you how.

    A Certain Four Year Old Child received many wonderful birthday presents this past week for having turned four years old.  Let me interrupt myself here to say that these did not come from me.  I believe in keeping children's birthday's simple and that while we celebrate their birthdays, bake cakes, blow out candles, wrap a few gifts, less is more.  Especially when they are very young.  Amen and amen and amen.  But the extra fancy overflowing overabundance of presents came from well meaning outside sources, and the drama and attention got to Four Year Old Child's tiny four year old head.  She started to think she was bigger than her britches.  She started thinking that since she was The Queen of the World, it was OK to talk back to her parents, to pout and whine and in everything act entitled.

  This Mama bear saw the shift in dynamic and took away all of Four Year Old Child's toys.  Even the old ones, even the new ones.  

She has now survived a night and half of a day with no toys. 

     Sometime around mid morning, Four Year Old Child's temperament went back to playful, sweet, and even a touch humble.  She started playing and singing and dancing around the house, imagining  scenarios.  And then we all went outside. 

     Outside, we accomplished all of the things on my one year old son's to do list. 

 (To see this list, please read the previous post.)  

While One Year Old was accomplishing his tasks, Four Year Old Child began collecting acorns.  She soon realized that if you shake the acorns, they rattle.  So then commenced the stepping on of the acorns to crush them, to open them and see what was inside.  I was secretly curious to let her do this  to see if there were any maggots. 

If you want to know why this was important to me, you will have to read the previous post.  

     We found no maggots inside, but something that looked like a nut.  So we stomp crushed a few more acorns, pulled out the nuts and stomp crushed those, too.

 Call it science class, mixed with cooking class. 

 Call it homeschooling.  

Call it your tax dollars hard at work.

Just don't call it spoiled.

Sometimes children will misbehave because they are overstimulated but do not know how to tell you that.  

Our lives were not meant to be Pinterest picture perfect post cards.  

Yes, you should strive for excellence in all that you do, but when excellence gets replaced by perfectionism, everything suffers. 

 The children suffer. 

 Excellence is about living to please the Lord, working at it with all your heart.  Daily working out your salvation with fear and trembling.  Taking things seriously, instead of sleep walking through life while simultaneously expecting our children to hurry up and pay attention. 

 Perfection is about living to please what we think others expect of us, but one upping that to say "I am above you, I don't need anything, and this is effortless for me.  I cannot relate to you in any way.  Look at me and wish.  Oh but I will invite your kid to my perfect child's birthday party, and everything will be "just so," and you will feel "just less than."  

   If a child already has everything, how does the child ever learn to appreciate anything?

Children are naturally busy, they do need exercise.  

And attention

And mental stimulus. 

But the wide world is in itself a very busy, 

energetic,

stimulating place,

especially to those newly arrived,

who have not yet figured everything out.

"Stillness," and the idea of "being still" are concepts which needs to be taught.

It's good for children to get bored, it's good for them to want things they do not already have.  It's good for children to have to wait.  It's good for our kids to experience times in their lives where maybe they have an uneven haircut,  or their mouths look awkward as their baby teeth get traded in for grown up teeth.  These things are called growing pains, and they lead to creative problem solving skills, which in turn lead to your child growing up to be a somewhat interesting, kind, empathetic and self controlled adult.  At least I sure hope this is true, because that is the goal to which I am looking far, far ahead.  

In the meantime, let's just say that humility and obedience will go a long way towards Four Year Old Child getting her toys back. 

(If ever.)